Friday, June 5, 2009

Regaining Consciousness

One of my sweet sisters sent this to me today. It's called the YaYa many ways (more than I really want to admit to) it describes life in our zoo this week. ....let me explain a little.

For several months now we've had increasing trouble with Little Critter and his attitude mostly towards me, but also towards several adults. It was most puzzling as he has wonderful manners....most the time. And when he chooses to use them, people are usually blown away by his maturity level. But lately, he's chosen to not use them with me and has been increasingly rude and disrespectful. No amount of fussing, paddling, taking away priveleges or times out have seemed to help alleviate the problem. I was not only hurt and sad about this, but also bumfuzzled. What in the world could have gotten into my sweet, loving, squirmy, wormy little boy?!?!?! I had this horrible thought one day, and asked the Dr. about it when we went in for Little Critter's annual checkup. But Dr. assured me he was far too young and we wouldn't have those problems for a couple more years.... Still there was a niggle in my mommy heart that something wasn't right. Hmmmm.

Well, the last three days have been miserable for both Dodi and I. Little Critter has been almost totally out of control....rude to both of us, disrespectful, nasty, hateful to others and downright mean to all living creatures. Today, as we were beginning the preps for Shabbat, it came to a head. He blew it with me, I lost my temper, paddled his backside, sent him to his room, and (sigh, I'm ashamed to say this........) I ran away from home. Yep, I gathered my things, took the car keys and told Dodi I was leaving and would be back sometime. When the poor man asked what happened, I snapped "Ask YOUR son! I'm sure he'll say it's all my fault!!!!" and then drove off. I'm not proud of my actions.....but I was about to do some serious harm to my child.....starting with yanking that nasty little tongue out of his mouth and wrapping it around his neck!!!!!!!

Fortunately, my parents (to whose house I ran) allowed me to vent my frustrations, offered their advice and after about an hour sent me back home. to apologize to my poor Dodi. I did, he understood and told me he loved me still. Feeling better now, I left Little Critter in his room while I prepared things for Shabbat. I knew I had to talk with him, but needed to allow Papa to rid me of my anger, sooth my hurt heart and talk some sense into me. He did. And before Shabbat started we'd both apologized, talked and spent some sweet time together with giggles, hugs and affirmations of our love for each other. Shabbat was a lovely time together as a family with a friend over.

As for the source of the problems.....well, I'm afraid I was right. Papa told me to trust my mommy heart. He speaks to it regularly! Little Critter is going into the male version of PMS....or puberty. He's only just turned 9, and this shouldn't be happening for a couple years. But it is. So for those of you with young boys.....cherish your cuddles and giggles while you can. And when they suddenly turn into Jeckel/Hyde, hit your knees!!!! Papa can and will give you all the patience (oh how I hate that P word!!!!), control and wisdom you need. Just hit your knees before you run away....grin. It's so undignified.....

May Papa bless each of you this Shabbat and may you each feel Papa's love for you. He loves you like crazy ya know. Heiveinu Shalom Aleichem. (May peace be on you) Spitfire


WisdomFromTorah said...


Spitfire I understand. I am at the other end where boys fight to prove they are men with their fathers.

My sons can talk to my wife better and my daughter can talk to me better when it's a fight to prove they are adult. My oldest who's son is in my picture had a knockdown with me. We had verbal blows. But then I realized what was happening. I remember how I things came to a head with my own dad.

There will be a great day not to soon when most of his focus will be at primarily at Dodi. Dodi will get the brunt of it till Little Critter get settle as an adult.

As you mentioned to me you may have seen it with your nephew, you raised as a son.

I pray for Yahweh peace for you all
Yah's Blessings and Shalom

Gayle said...

I've been there and done that. I didn't run away from home, but I did do the pounding on the behind thing, Spitfire, and I'm not ashamed to say I did it more than once! I never used anything other than my bare hand though, and didn't have to resort to it very often. Children - especially those hitting puberty - do need to know they must be respectful and can't get away with murder. If you had let him get away with it, it would only have gotten worse, and I'm sorry to say this, but it isn't over yet. This is just the beginning! (So sorry.)

I hate the "P" word too, and still pray for it all the time even though all my children are adults. I pray for it because of the political mess this country is in. Whenever I find myself swearing at the news, I remember who's really in charge and pray for more patience. It's the hardest thing in the world to come by!

Ahavah said...

SEE! told you it was hormones... my own son went through something similarly awful time... it was his god-father who put us onto the problem... I will send you an email with what he said...

ah bless him,,, puberty is such a trying time FOR ALL THOSE INVOLVED!

Glad you survived .... this round :0D